Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Peter bite into a packet of money?

People told him he should put his money where his mouth is.

1926
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What happens when military officers attend a party?

They order everyone "a round".

1232
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Is the quantum physics theory about electrons disappearing and reappearing elsewhere really true?

That's neither here nor there.

878
General
Picture

What do you call a bank that is located next to a river?

A river bank.

3142
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What did the man's wife say when he woke up hung over, after a party?

She asked what was "ale"ing him.

706
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What type of granite is always red?

A pomegranate.

2752
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What's the proper thing to say to a friend who just bought a fancy new wine cooler?

Cool!

3173
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What can you say about a person who learns to say no?

That now he knows.

777
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

How did Oedipus feel after he found out what he had done?

He felt like an Oedipus wreck.

1948
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call a bat that makes short, periodic dinging noises?

A dingbat.

1562
General
Picture

What is a rabbit's favorite music?

Hip hop.

2512
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Rose like the weekend?

Because the weekdays made her weak, and the weekend made her strong again.

1609