Pictures:

What seat lies?

Either 1. deceit or 2. a recliner.

2118

Why was the tourist dropped off on a deserted island?

He requested an isle seat.

1461

Why did the pastry chef cut her chocolate cake at such sharp angles?

She wanted Brownie points

211

What do leaders say when they demand that everyone follow what they say?

The ruler's rules rule.

1906

To measure the size of a bagel, how much of the bagel do you include?

You include the whole.

2660

What happened when the drummer rejoined the marching band?

There were repercussions.

1257

Why is the ocean right now like money?

It's a current sea.

1425

What being always acts and feels lousy?

The louse.

2394

Why did George sell his barber shop?

He found cleaning it to be a hair-raising experience.

871

Why did the programmer call an exterminator?

Because he had a bug in his program.

722

What did people call their activity of dashing things over the cliffs onto the rocks 100 yards below?

The hundred yard dash.

1847

Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

422