Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

When do you want to be put down?

When making an appointment.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What did the surgeon say when the patient asked if he could administer his own anesthesia?

Sure, knock yourself out.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What can you say about the stories of how staples, paper-clips, and thumb-tacks were developed?

They are all fasten-ating.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What kind of scientist studies bubbles?

A fizz-a-cist.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call someone who doesn't care about what people say about him?

He has heard immunity.

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General
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When the stadium's gardener was pulling up weeds, what did he say to the team?

I'm rooting for you.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is a good name for a car repair shop, that takes care of cars like a mother cares for children?

Good Car Ma

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

How is the metric system similar to a guy going on a date?

They both involve a 'meet her'.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

How do authorities in England express their appreciation for the public maintaining orderly lines?

They say, "ThanQueue

545
General
Picture

What does a duck wear to his wedding?

A ducksedo.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call someone who is against hypocrisy?

A faux foe.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did Barbie's boyfriend tell her?

You're a doll.

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