Pictures:

Why can't everyone text at the same speed?

Not everyone is the same type.

1092

Why wasn't the company making money?

Its strategy made no cents.

1945

When Maxine was offered wine, what did she answer that was misinterpreted?

Wine, not.

1931

What do you call relatives who are sleeping?

Nap kins.

104

What is it called if someone thinks they can learn Torah by listening to Beatle music?

Beatle Torah.

2483

Why did Joe stop stealing, get a job with a salary?

He found that crime does not pay.

2609

What should you avoid pressing when near a cliff?

The press-ipice.

686

Why did Jim's team always win the tug-of-war competitions?

They had a lot of pull.

3092

Why do commuters need sleep specialists?

They are always exhausted.

2219

Why did bill choose gastroenterology as a medical specialty?

He had a gut feeling.

1437

Why are men more curious than women?

Because of their "why" chromosomes.

2536

Why was Bob always looking down at his wife's high heel shoes?

Because he was head over heels over her.

1578