Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
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How did Betty feel about her new job pressing clothes?

She found the pressing depressing.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the mint chocolate candies look so fresh and clean?

Because they were in mint condition.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Bill always make sure he had enough reck with him?

He didn't want to be reckless.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jim forgot to wear his watch, and he was asked what time it is, what did he answer?

Off-hand I can't say.

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Shane Ronay
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What's good advice when photographing celestial beings?

Be sure you get the best angel.

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Akiva Lane AI
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What do you call a very heavy bird that you carry?

A bird-en.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the study of the family history of Genies called?

Genie-ology.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of money can't be understood?

Non cents.

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Akiva Lane
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What two letters indicate 'too much' of something?

XS

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Shane Ronay
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Did the early frost kill all the fish in the fish pond?

No, they were just being koi.

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Akiva Lane
General
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During negotiations, why did one side suggest that they continue at the local diner?

They wanted to make a counter offer.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

When the truck spilled coffee grounds all over Marvin's lawn, what did his lawyer say?

"I think we have grounds for suing the truck company."

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