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Akiva Lane
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What time is it 15 minutes before you finish a meal?

A quarter to ate.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a rat whose name is Demmik?

Demmik Rat.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bill feel when he was preparing his taxes?

He felt the taxes were attacks.

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Akiva Lane
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If a hiker meets in the woods a large bear on the left and a small bear on the right, what should he do?

Bear right.

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Akiva Lane
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What does the Eiffel Tower and dangerous germs have in common?

They are both Paris sites.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a good name for a company that sells sprinkler systems?

Cease Fire (an actual name of a company)

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Akiva Lane
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What was Betty's reaction when the glass jar fell and broke?

She found it jarring.

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General
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What is similar between a Japanese couch an ottoman foot rest?

One is a futon, and the other you put your foot on.

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Akiva Lane
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How did cell phones get their name?

Because if we're not careful, they can imprison us.

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Shane Ronay
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What was the name of Joe's band, and which instrument did he play?

Band Joe.

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Akiva Lane
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How would you describe the fact that ducks make more and better eggs than chickens?

It's a para-ducks.

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Akiva Lane
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What are earings called that are in the shape of pears?

A pear of earrings.

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