Pictures:

What was Bill's reaction when he got hit in the head with a can of soda?

He felt lucky it was a soft drink.

855

Why did Bruce breed racing deer?

He wanted to make a fast buck.

1898

Why can't you trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

1704

Why is bread a lot like the sun?

Because it rises in the yeast, and sets in the waist.

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How did Bill feel after he spent time crushing soda cans?

It was soda pressing.

613

Why was Fred very good at sleeping?

He could do it with his eyes closed.

1332

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

853

What happened to the man who sued the airline for losing his luggage?

He lost his case.

856

What do you need to spell the word Panda?

Just a P and A.

1908

Why do French eat snails?

They don't like fast food.

3235

How does a hippie with 2 wives count them?

One Mrs. Hippie, two Mrs. Hippie.

1648

Why shouldn't you tell secrets in a farmer's field?

Because potatoes have eyes, corn has ears, and the beanstalk.

3128