Pictures:

How does a hippie with 2 wives count them?

One Mrs. Hippie, two Mrs. Hippie.

1648

Why did Fred stop being an accountant?

He started hearing invoices.

2111

What do you call someone who helps on a farm?

A farm assist.

2485

Why do French eat snails?

They don't like fast food.

3235

What do you call a row of rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare line.

1899

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

853

Why do bald people find it difficult to throw out their comb?

They can't part with it.

1897

Why was Fred very good at sleeping?

He could do it with his eyes closed.

1332

Why do horses tend to get along well with each other?

They have stable relationships.

1895

What was Bill's reaction when he got hit in the head with a can of soda?

He felt lucky it was a soft drink.

855

What happened when Bob re-labled the jars in his wife's spice rack?

He's not in trouble yet, but the thyme is cumin.

1956

Why didn't Jane play hide and seek?

Good players are hard to find.

1910