Pictures:

What do you need to spell the word Panda?

Just a P and A.

1908

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

853

What would happen if Finland closed its borders?

People wouldn't be able to cross the Finnish line.

3106

Why is bread a lot like the sun?

Because it rises in the yeast, and sets in the waist.

1570

What happened with Fred by mistake gave his wife glue stick instead of chapstick?

Now she's not talking to him.

2982

What is a curve that can set a lot of things straight?

A smile.

1657

What was Bill's reaction when he got hit in the head with a can of soda?

He felt lucky it was a soft drink.

855

Why shouldn't you tell secrets in a farmer's field?

Because potatoes have eyes, corn has ears, and the beanstalk.

3128

What is a very good thing about Switzerland?

Their flag is a big plus.

1334

What is a book about all the things that a person thinks they should have done differently?

An oughta-biography.

1341

What does Sudafed mean?

Bringing litigation against a government official.

716

How did Bill feel after he spent time crushing soda cans?

It was soda pressing.

613