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Why did Mother Goose's child stay home from school?

It was a lame duck.

205

Which crime is most prevalent at this school?

Assault

488

What type of music do young ladies like best?

Hymns

2286

How do you distinguish between a numerator and denominator?

There's a fine line between the two.

1013

Why do 95% of bald people still own a comb?

They can't part with it.

2221

Why must all people grow spiritually?

It's our soul purpose.

1993

Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

422

What are mens' favorite legume?

Chick peas

683

What did the surgeon say when the patient asked if he could administer his own anesthesia?

Sure, knock yourself out.

432

What is a contradictory fact about this specific school?

It's off a 4 lane highway.

491

Why is there a lack of neurologists?

Few have the nerve.

245

What is someone called who sees a crime committed at an Apple store?

An iWitness

1240