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What excuse can be used by a person who drinks too much?

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.

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What famous saying does this represent?

Two bees or not two bees.

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Why should we be very careful handling glass?

There's a reason it's called a pain of glass.

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How did the moose get into the restaurant?

The customer asked for mousse, and the waiter brought him one.

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What's the opposite of a Thanksgiving turkey?

A spring chicken.

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How did Linda react when she saw that her bank balance started with a minus sign?

She thought it was a bad sign.

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Why do we peel fruits and vegetables?

It makes them more appealing.

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Where are the dots that are over the letter i?

The i's have it.

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Why didn't Beverly believe anything written on the humidifier?

Because it was full of hot air.

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What is a noun that makes money?

A pro noun.

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What part of the year do leaders have to be especially cautious?

The fall.

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How did Sam feel when he left the Far East?

He felt dis-oriented.

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