Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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Why was Bill hesitant to have a rock band play on his yacht?

He was always told it's not good to rock the boat.

1580
Akiva Lane
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Why was it that in the ancient world harps could not be trusted?

Because they were all lyres.

1106
Akiva Lane
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What is a tavern called that only serves chocolate liqueur?

A chocolate bar.

2726
Akiva Lane
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What did the young man and woman eskimos have to do on their first date?

Break the ice.

895
Akiva Lane
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What did the chiropractor say when he started working on a patient?

Welcome back.

2296
Akiva Lane
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What did the cheese say when it was shredded?

I feel grate.

2260
Akiva Lane
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When the desire to repent is pent-up, where does one repent?

In a pent-house.

1708
Akiva Lane
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If a person is comfortable in social situations, what does he have?

Social security.

1995
Akiva Lane
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How did the comb feel after it had its teeth made thinner?

It felt fine.

266
Akiva Lane
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When you are very tired and need to rest, where should you go?

A rest room.

1935
Akiva Lane
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What happens to a person whose drinking leads him to committing crimes?

He goes from drinking bars to jail bars.

2786
Akiva Lane
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What can you say about the stories of how staples, paper-clips, and thumb-tacks were developed?

They are all fasten-ating.

2393