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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a public bathroom where people talk about politics?

A political potty.

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What kind of pan is very disorganized?

Pan-demonium.

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Why was Sally afraid that the vegetables would slap her?

Because she knew they were fresh.

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Why did Phil stop turning around?

Because every time he turned around, another year went by.

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Why did Jim feel like a flamingo?

Because he couldn't put his foot down.

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What are our great-grandfathers called?

Our four fathers.

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What is called if a lawyer charges nothing to help write a will?

Free will.

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What is a cane called that a shepherd uses to get animals to move faster?

A hurry cane.

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Who did Yvonne go to in order to take care of her eye tic?

A tic doc.

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What is the difference between an ox and an egg?

The yoke of the ox is outside, the yolk of the egg is inside.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

Congress.

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What do you call a father from Iceland?

An ice pop.

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