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Why did Martha lose weight when she ate vegetables?

Because they took away her appetite.

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Why did Milton Berle say he is going to stop turning around?

Because every time he turns around, another year goes by.

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What school teaches about tea?

Universi-Tea.

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What is it called when people hold that only their belief system is valid?

Pious bias.

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How would you describe the fact that ducks make more and better eggs than chickens?

It's a para-ducks.

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Why did Amanda move slowly on days that she didn't eat in order to lose weight?

She moved slowly on fast days.

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Why did the maple tree feel bad?

When people took its maple syrup, it felt like such a sap, and it sapped its energy.

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What is a group of pictures of people laughing called?

Laughing stock.

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Why did Amanda enjoy re-reading books by James Joyce?

She liked re-Joyce-ing.

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What was the result of Joe not having enough self-control with eating?

He found that it was a big waist.

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What is the plural of why?

Wise.

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Why didn't Joe like running at the track?

He felt like he was just running around in circles.

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