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Why did King Midas make a well?

He thought, I might as well.

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How did Beth feel about all the knots in her hair?

She was knot happy.

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What is the motto of people who keep to a strict budget?

We have a budget, and we won't let it budge.

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When Sharon found an old copy of Crime and Punishment, what was she holding?

A dusty Dostoevsky.

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Why did Barry wear an oxygen mask when he saw a beautiful sunset?

Because it took his breath away.

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Why did Arnold fly in a plane over the North Pole?

He wanted to get over a cold.

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What do you call someone who is an expert at choosing clocks for counter-tops?

Counter clock wise.

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Why do shoes sneeze when they get hot?

They become hot-shoes!

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What is similar between a house of worship and Swiss cheese?

They're both holy.

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What arm of the octopus is the strongest?

The Arm E.

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What US city has 2 male children?

Tuscon, Arizona.

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How did the recession affect the company that made air conditioners?

It took the wind out of their sales.

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