Pictures:

What did the mother say to get her son to stop playing video games and come to dinner?

Step up to the plate.

3025

Why don't red and blue get along with each other?

They are on different wavelengths.

526

What is a good slogan for the Republican Party?

The elephant is relevant.

1140

Why is moving from one house to another like fighting?

Because it involves boxing.

1553

Why did Cynthia stop drawing the line on the paper?

Because it was the end of the line.

544

What is it called when someone decides not to do costmetic surgery on their face?

They're doing an about face about their face.

3322

What day do armies go off to battle?

March forth.

405

What three letters are not our friend?

NME

2750

Why did Jimmy wonder where the planet Noyd is?

Because his mother said she was a Noyd.

869

What do sales people, bartenders, and baseball teams have in common?

They all have pitchers.

2263

Why did Mr. Roberts take his key with an R attached, and put in on the upper hook on the wall?

He believed in the principle of higher R key.

2244

What was Bill's reaction when someone approached him with a negative attitude?

He was non-plussed.

1686