Pictures:

What is good motto for a gym, to encourage people to lose weight?

Let there be light!

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What is the motto of people who keep to a strict budget?

We have a budget, and we won't let it budge.

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Why did the employee make sure he never signed his name twice?

He was concerned that if he re-signed, he'd be out of a job.

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What did the chiropractor say when he started working on a patient?

Welcome back.

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Were the people in the Middle Ages bad people?

Not really, they were only medi-evil.

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Why did Nicholas's friends call him 'Nick'?

Because that was his nickname.

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What do you call someone who steals dishes?

Dish-honest.

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When Alan and Betty Jones got lost during the African safari, what was their main worry?

They didn't want to be caught behind enemy lions.

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What name did Mr. and Mrs. Tross have second thoughts about naming their baby boy?

Albert.

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What did Jim call his life after he decided not to major in math?

The aftermath.

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What was Betty's reaction when the recipe called for stirring the batter?

She kept on stirring until she went batty and stir crazy.

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What is it called when fishermen connect their nets together to catch fish?

An internet.

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