Pictures:

What is news from last week called?

Olds.

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What is a pretty angle called?

Acute angle.

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What do you call a crockpot that is broken?

A crackpot.

2580

When the cat fell into a large bag of quarters, why was it so scared?

Because it was in close quarters.

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What postage is similar to a woman giving birth?

Special delivery.

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What is similar between a tile salesman and a lizard?

One is a tile rep, and the other is a reptile.

2162

What is ironic when we eat food because we don't want it to go to waste?

Often that's the food that DOES go to waist.

2472

What do you call a polygon with thousands of sides?

A balagon ('overly complicated' in Hebrew)

2267

When the phone caller said 'I hope I'm not disturbing you', how did Andy respond?

Andy said, "You can't disturb me, because I'm already disturbed".

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Why did they come up with the phrase 'The Fastest Gun In The West'?

They wanted a slogan for a fast gun.

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After a long winter, how did the tree feel in the spring?

It felt releaved.

3115

Why did Fred dislike his job using a drill-press?

He found it very boring.

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