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What happened to the person who snuck into the heated swimming pool?

He's now in hot water.

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What do you call software whose sales are flat?

Flatware

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Why did Jimmy wonder where the planet Noyd is?

Because his mother said she was a Noyd.

869

What is the origin of the word 'stain'?

It's a spot that is stayin' in the clothes.

141

What part of the computer screen do you have to be careful about what it says?

The cursor.

1015

Why was the farm worker disappointed?

He thought he was promised a good salary, but they gave him a good celery.

1790

What do you call a group of investors that trust each other?

A trust fund

2755

Why didn't Barry ever work out in the gym?

He planned to go there, but it never worked out.

2297

How did Johnny feel when he spent all the pennies in his piggy bank?

It left him cents-less.

97

What did the waiter say when the customer sent the food back to the kitchen?

Thanks for the feedback.

2385

What was done wrong here?

Someone put all their eggs in one basket.

1700

How do you translate MS/DOS from Hebrew to English?

Honest Thinking (Emes Das)

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