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Akiva Lane
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Why is 8 followed by 9?

Because if you're offered food after you ate, you say: Nein.

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Akiva Lane
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What helps traction in marriage?

Attraction.

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How did Patty feel about her wonderful female cat?

She was purr-fect.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a Tyrannosaurus Rex that is nervous?

A nervous Rex.

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What do dentists never tell their patients?

Keep your mouth shut.

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What is the difference between an elephant and a car?

One has the trunk in the front, and the other has the trunk in the back.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Marla always start walking with her right foot?

She wanted to put her best foot forward.

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What is a hotel called that is named in honor of potatoes?

Suite Potatoes.

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What did the chiropracter say to his patient?

When I'm done, your right back will be right back.

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Akiva Lane
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If you take a pleated skirt, and take the pleats out, what does it become?

Depleted.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is KO the opposite of OK?

When we're not feeling OK, we feel Knocked Out.

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What did the mother say to get her son to stop playing video games and come to dinner?

Step up to the plate.

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