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What is a trip to the spice store to buy spices called?

Thyme travel.

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When a man and a woman go on a date, how many kinds of dates are there?

Among others: accomodate, candidate, consolidate, elucidate, update, raindate, validate, inundate, and intimidate.

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What do you call heating oil that you pay for every month?

Term oil.

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Why did the therapist keep a bell in his office?

If what he said didn't ring a bell with the patient, he could ring the bell for the patient.

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What happened to Cynthia when she was in Hollywood and hit her head?

She saw stars.

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What psychiatric tool is similar the noses of hippies?

Hip noses.

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What happened to the kitchen pot when it's owner found it's lid?

It's now fully recovered.

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Why did the blues band remind Bob of his days hunting whales?

The wailing reminded him of whaling.

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How did Mark feel when he used a machine to get rid of his static?

He felt ex-static.

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Where do shoes go to get stronger?

Boot camp.

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Why did Sam try to bite a bunch of coins?

He wanted them to become bit coins.

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What crime does this describe?

Assault and battery.

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