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Akiva Lane
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What fairy tale is about using puns in rap music?

Rap-pun-zel.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jeff start rope climbing?

He wanted to learn the ropes.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you describe professional athletes?

They are pro-active.

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Akiva Lane
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What is it called when carpets are dropped out of planes?

Carpet bombing.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call Israelis that have vineyards?

Grape Jews.

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What kind of running results in having less of something?

Running out of something.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a woodworker who can make a chair out of a flat piece of wood?

Chair man of the board.

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Why did Bill throw a stone out of the car window whenever he made a turn?

He didn't want to leave any turn un-stoned.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Mr. & Mrs. Auer call eating a meal together?

They called it our Auer hour.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the steam iron that had very little water very tired?

It was running out of steam.

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Akiva Lane
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If your dog is not telling the truth while it is sleeping, what should you do?

As the saying goes, let sleeping dogs lie.

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Akiva Lane
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How are banks like trees?

They both have branches.

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